I had recently written an
article about sex work--particularly prostitution--that offered something seldom seen in either side of the debate these days: nuance. To wit, I had argued that it is both "the oldest profession" AND "the oldest oppression", and the difference ultimately depends on who has the power. I had also argued that Women need to take over the industry and that decriminalization is, on balance, the least-worst alternative for the time being.
But I realize that I left out something crucial, namely the
other main kind of commercial sex work: PORN. While it contains many of the same issues that prostitution has, it also has a much wider audience and thus much wider influence. In fact, it is an even bigger elephant in the room, and is more accessible now than ever before. So what do we do about porn then?
To be brutally honest, we need to come to terms with a rather inconvenient truth. Porn, or at least 99% of the stuff that's out there today (give or take a percentage point), does indeed have a
serious dark side. It typically contains--when it is not overtly cruel, violent, and degrading to Women, like far too much of it is--a particular kind of warped, twisted, toxic, and patriarchal (i.e. male-dominated) version of "sexuality" that is markedly and often fundamentally different than healthy sexuality. Also, many of the performers, especially the Women, are often forced, coerced, deceived, and/or brainwashed into it. And the often very young viewers end up with a
distorted view of what sex is really all about, particularly if porn is the only "sex education" they ever really had. Thus, "making love" gets confused with the "making hate" that is normalized in porn, with predictable results.
So where does this dark side actually come from? You guessed it--the MEN who control and create it. And, of course, the MEN who demand it reinforce it even further. But either way, it begins and ends with MEN. Yet the genie is out of the bottle at this point, and any attempt to ban it entirely is certain to backfire, to say nothing of free speech issues. The only real solution, I believe, is for Women to take over the porn industry and jam the culture for the better. And yes, there is indeed
such a thing as
feminist porn--not only is that
not an oxymoron, but there
needs to be more of it. Yesterday.
There are, of course, those who cynically argue that there is inherently no such thing as feminist porn and can never be, period. They even give examples to try in vain to prove this unprovable negative. But the questionable examples they give of so-called "feminist porn" are in fact straw-man examples that are virtually identical (at least in content) to male-dominated mainstream genres. It is of course not enough for it to be produced by Women and done without coercion, but the content itself also needs to at least largely reflect a more feminist and humanizing paradigm of sexuality as well. Thus, such critics do not actually "debunk" the real concept at all, which does in fact exist.
In the meantime, there are several other things that we as a society should do. We need to help
young people develop better
media literacy to safely navigate a world in which the internet porn genie is long out of the bottle. We need real, honest, accurate, shame-free
sex education that goes beyond the pathetic joke that passes for it currently. We need to crack down on any form of coercion or trafficking that does occur in the porn industry, of both adults and children, and have better regulation and monitoring of the industry to prevent it. We need tough laws against "revenge porn" as well. And we should probably require that at least all free porn sites (that don't require a credit card for age verification) be shunted onto the .
xxx top-level domain so exposure to such sites can be more readily blocked and filtered from children (currently, the average age of first exposure is 11, and often accidentally). All of these things need to be done yesterday.
But at the same time, we must also take a nuanced view that porn is not always inherently bad or unhealthy, and realize that
censorship is NOT a solution--it is in fact a part of the problem, as is the denial of Women's agency. And furthermore, we also need to realize that once we start punishing people for "thoughtcrimes", we will have essentially crossed the proverbial Rubicon on the road to [insert dystopian novel here]. And that, ladies and gentlemen, is far more horrifying than even the very worst gonzo porn out there--which really says something!
As I like to say, if we make the perfect the enemy of the good, we ultimately end up with neither.
